Dame Good

Some facts, no matter how implausible they may seem, have a tendency to lie in the weeds for a while and remain unnoticed. For example, I bet you didn't know that the author of the groundbreaking book, "Don't Stand Too Close to a Naked Man" is the same man that possesses the ever-heartfelt, angelic voice that narrates those Pure Michigan commercials (Tim Allen). Even more incredible however is the fact that Notre Dame's basketball team, who is without a surefire first team All-Big East performer for the first time in recent memory, holds the ranking of the 9th best team in all the land. The Irish, who boast a team that is made up of mostly castoffs and role players from years prior, have rose from not even being mentioned in the "best of the rest" category in most polls to one of the top 10 teams in the country. And, at 17-4 and with the likes of DePaul, Rutgers, South Florida, Providence and Seton Hall all coming up within their next 7 games, the Irish have a foreseeable chance to sit atop the highest rated conference in the country when the season completes in early March.

But how are they doing it? With 3 white starters who at first glance look they belong in H&M promo ads more so than Notre Dame's Adidas sponsored unis, how have they possibly came out victorious against Wisco, G-Town, UCONN and Pitt? As the band Spoon once said in song, "if you got no fear of the underdog, you will not survive" (great jam) and ND has taken these lyrics literally in defending their home court all season long. Think about ND's best players. One is Ben Hansbrough. Now don't get me wrong, I hated Psycho T just as much as the next guy. The dude was a smarmy, smarmy nerd who got off to home vids of himself doing tricep extensions and then washed it all down with a Muscle Milk juice-box while watching Sports Science. But Benny boy, how can you not be impressed with what his college career has turned into? As an underclassman, he ran the point at Mississippi State University only to come to realize later that he was still in Starkville, a garbage city in a state that hadn't seen a relevant basketball game since Danny Manning graduated high school in Mississippi in 1984. Following Ben on the transfer trail was former Purdue swingman Scott Martin, who ditched the 75% male enrollment at Purdue to contribute for the Golden Domers in the newly renovated Joyce Center. Throw in an off guard whose last name sounds like a throat illness (Tim Abromaitis) and there you have it, the 9th best team in the country.

Mike Brey has one of the better haircuts amongst the coaching fraternity in college basketball, that's no secret. But this year, he's done an exceptional job coaching the talent allotted to him in South Bend and finds himself in the thick of the Big East race. If Notre Dame can somehow channel the confidence in which they play with at the Joyce and take that mentality on the road, the Irish could have a shot. For Tim Abromaitis, hopefully this time he doesn't get caught.

As for Pick of the Day, the thin air in Salt Lake along with Charlotte's thin bench led to the Bobcats demise against the spread last night as the Pulse Man added another notch on his (betting) belt. For tonight, the Pulse Man likes the Spurs giving 5 at the Rose Garden in Portland on the first of da month. Wake up, wake up, wake up.

Pick of the Day: Spurs (-5) @ Blazers- SPURS

Record:(51-35-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Sharper Image

First of all, let me just say that whoever is in charge of making the final decision on the formatting of the NHL All-Star game should be working at Cash for Gold come Monday. I mean, for the love of the sport, find something that works and stick to it. In past years, we've had North America vs. The World, and Eastern Conference vs. Western Conference, establishing some firm allegiances for the players to represent. But this year, they chose to throw the sticks on the ice and have captains choose. Really? What is this? A pre-teen game of capture the flag? And furthermore, could they possibly decide upon two less controversial captains than Nicklas Lidstrom and Eric Staal. If they wanted to capture the nostalgia of Mystery, Alaska, you can't name two frontmen without any personality. Granted, Lidstrom and Staal are two of the best defenseman in the business, that's not even debatable, but they're not going to stir their teams into a frenzy in a meaningless exhibition game. Now, Crosby and Ovechkin, they could do that. But the NHL would never succumb to that wish because that would just be quenching too much of the viewer's thirst, and after all, they're still a major professional sports enterprise.

So with the meaningless teams decided and the goals piling up like Charlie Sheen rehab stints, the NHL's All-Stars casually skated around for a couple of hours and exchanged pleasantries with division and conference rivals. I get it. Hockey is a demanding sport and the NHL is a demanding season, let alone the playoffs. But this game was like watching Billy Elliot on Ice at the Allstate. The only highlight of the game was when Ovechkin blatantly threw his stick at Matt Duchene in an attempt to...I don't know, trip him? Make a joke? Ovechkin! (watch the ending)

Still, with all the crisp passing and playful skating that this game displayed, Patrick Sharp managed to make out with the game's MVP trophy. Honestly, I thought him and Mark Ruffalo switched places and Sharpie went to the SAG awards in some whimsical scheme they stole from an Olsen twins movie. What would you rather have, the NHL All-Star MVP trophy or the SAG award for playing the Best Supporting Actor in The Kids are All Right? Toss up. Either way, the guy who was wearing Patrick Sharp's jersey put the puck in the back of the net on one occasion and also contributed two helpers for "Team Staal". Perhaps this added hardware on Sharp's mantle can spark a spurt for the Blackhawks to become more consistent in the 2nd half. Now that they are finally close to full strength, the Hawks have a viable chance to climb the Eastern Conference ladder to avoid a grueling 7-game series in the playoffs' opening round. I guess we can consider All-Star weekend the highlight of the Blackhawks season so far--a popularity contest in which the homecoming king skated away with the highest award and a new car to get laid in...like he needed it.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man is now amongst the elite company to win 50 bets in his first 1/2 year of professional betting. For tonight, the Pulse man likes the Jazz giving 3 at home to the Bobcats.

Pick of the Day: Bobcats @ Jazz (-3)- JAZZ

Record:(50-35-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Tis' the Season

I don't know what to tell you, Mike. When people berated you for looking like a monkey, and thus argued that an actual marcupial could better defend the posts of the Big 10, I defiantly stood in your corner draped in one of those ornate, silk robes and squirted water down your threat like I was Dickie Eklund (minus the meth, of course). When people wrote you off as a 7-foot slug who would tie down Illinois' season in 2011, I argued that despite a body mass index that was comparable to Adrien Brody, your baby-hooks and delicate touch from 15 ft. could serve Bruce Weber well throughout the year. And even if it didn't, who the hell were we going to play instead? Meyers Leonard? Get real. We all know that any big who graduates high school in a city geographically lower than Peoria won't come on until at least mid-way through his Junior season (also known as the 'Champaign Supernova' rule). But why did we expect something different from Tisdale? Perhaps because we have seen his gangly wingspan swinging aimlessly around the painted area in Assembly Hall since early in his career? Because we have been witnesses of his imperfect posture and foul-prone post D for 3 years now? If nothing else, we thought that after 3 years of learning the hard way, maybe Tisdale would be able to take care of the rock in the final minutes of crucial conference games.

Last night, for the third time this season--Missouri, Ohio St., and now Indiana--Tisdale fumbled the basketball on a crucial Illinois possession in the 2nd half that led to his team's demise. In the Ohio State game, with an upset bid there for the taking, the Illini needed a 3. Somehow lost in the translation of the desgined play, Tizzy ended up with the ball and kicked it off the toe of his size 18 right into the first row. Last night, with the Illini trailing by a single point with less than :20 to go, Tisdale again proceeded to forfeit the basketball to the opposition. Why didn't McCamey have the pill in his hands looking to penetrate? I don't know. How did it end up in the mits of a guy who shot 2-10 and committed 4 personals on the night? Again, I'm speechless...I am without speech. If this sounds to you like a break-up between me and the Jungle Lover from Riverton, IL, you're right, that's exactly what it is.

In all fairness, you cannot shoulder this loss squarely on the gawky shoulders of Tisdale. Any time you lose to a team that is in the bottom 3 of the Big 10, it's not that just one guy that didn't show up--nobody did. McCamey, a supposed Natinal POY contender, had as many points (6) on Thursday as he will get phone numbers tonight at Firehouse. Bruce looked confused at times shuffling in questionable lineups and continuously leaving IU's shooters open for triples? That one dude is like 5'11', what did you think was the strength of his game? As a team, the Orange and Blue failed to reach the 50 point plateau against a beaten down Indiana squad! Yes, the same Hoosier team that gave up 91 points to Iowa! These bad road losses (Penn St., Indiana) are starting to back Illinois into a corner as they are now just 4-4 in the Big 10, a record good enough for a share of 5th place in the league. Even with the unveiling of their new unis, which is always a good mid-season morale boost, the Illini have yet to win in them. "I bet they hate the way they look, I guarantee it." Sorry, Men's Warehouse.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man is going after a player prop in the Bulls/Magic tilt to garner his 50th career win as a part of Chicago Sports Noise. For tongiht, the Pulse man likes Carlos Boozer's OVER in total points and rebounds, which is set at 28.5.

Pick of the Day: Carlos Boozer-TOTAL POINTS and REBOUNDS, 28.5- OVER

Record:(49-35-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

These Hills Have Eyes

As bizarre and outlandish as this metaphor might seem at first, the 2011 Chicago Blackhawks are Heidi Montag (or Heidi Pratt if you want to get technical). Before you all go running to the hills (no pun intended), hear me out for a second. At one time, Heidi was a fresh-faced, sincere starlet with delicate features and a cup size that wasn't halfway through the English alphabet (I know she had aspirations to become an H, don't ask me how I know that). She was the 'girl next door' type of teenager who wowed viewers with her natural beauty and her laughable IQ score that presumably peaked somewhere in the mid 70's. Now, she's neck deep in regret and saddled with the scars of two years worth of dumbfounding decisions. As for the Blackhawks, they were on top of the world (Stanley Cup/Season 2 of The Hills), then ditched the talent around them that they previously thought was disposable (Byfuglien, Versteeg, Niemi/Lauren, Lo, Audrina) and are now a couple of injuries away from breaking down completely (Heidi's surgery scars + divorce from Spencer = the end of Speidi/Toews and Kane both injury plagued= the end of the 2011 Blackhawks).

Last year, although the Hawks didn't always look like the future Stanley Cup champs throughout the season, you knew they had the talent to be able to pack-rat their pieces in time for a magical playoff run. This year, it just doesn't seem as if that's the case. The Hawks are vulnerable--in net, behind the blue line and even on the offensive side of the ice. A year ago, the Hawks were phenomenal at putting teams away early and holding their foot over their opponent's trachea for the rest of the game as they skated to 2 and 3 goal wins. Now, even when the Blackhawks muster a strong first period resulting in an early advantage, they surrender to their opponent easier than Cameron did to Ferris Bueller.

With that being said, it was nice to get a win over the rival Detroit Red Wings on Saturday. Taking a game away from Detroit considering what else that city deals with as far as sports is downright cruel. Honestly, that's like stealing lunch money from a kid when you know his parents just got divorced and his sister is turning tricks to keep the family home from foreclosing. But, even blind squirrels find nuts, and although I've never been a huge proponent of those lame expressions that your old man always says, it holds true in this case.

As for Pick of the Day, after being crucified by Jimmer the first time around, The Pulse Man looks to the Mormon Prince to slay the undefeated dragon that is San Diego State Wednesday night. In Jimmer we trust.

Special thanks to the "Wizard of Wheaton" for her contributions to this blog. She is the first woman to ever be a contributor for Chicago Sports Noise, so she's technically Martha Washington, Jackie Robinson and Anne Frank all rolled into one. Congrats.

Pick of the Day: SDSU @ BYU (-5)

Record:(48-35-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Right-Hand Men

After the Bears' overachieving 2010-2011 season came to a disheartening end on Sunday afternoon and sparked the Twit-world into a frenzy, it is now time to refocus our frustration to Clark and Addison St. No, I don't mean go to Wrigleyville and drown your sorrows in $6 draft beers from Murphy's Bleachers, a place where I'm pretty sure I saw a kid without a middle school diploma sneak by the bouncer on one occasion. I mean Cubs baseball. As we sit through another February in the Windy City, scraping the windshields of our frozen mid-size sedans and wrapped up in scarves shielding the frigid air like we're Oliver Twist, Cubs baseball is on the minds of many. But in thinking about the Cubs comes the constant questioning of their motives in the front office. Already in 2011, the Cubs have signed Matt Garza, a promising, relatively young smoke-thrower from Tampa Bay, but then had to trade Tom Gorzelanny, an Evergreen Park, IL (Marist High School) native who actually did a decent job stopping the incessant bleeding during 4-6 game skids a year ago. So now the Cubs have a 5 man starting rotation that is without a southpaw (Zambrano, Wells, Garza, Silva, Dempster) in a division that is strung with mostly right-handed hitting dominance (Pujols, Braun, Holliday), but still boasts some left-handed power (primarily Votto and Fielder). All I'm saying is, eventually the Cubs will need someone who can deal from the first base side of the rubber. Now, whether or not that opportunity falls on the shoulders of my favorite Cub, Sean Marshall, or some shmohawk we pick up from a designated assignment with the Altoona Curve (a real AA affiliate of the Pirates) remains to be seen. In case your forgot about how we here at CSN feel about Sean Marshall, let me refresh your memory with this tidbit that was written in July of 2010.

"Sean Marshall- Sean Marshall may seem to possess a prudent, level-headed demeanor, but lets get real. Look Deeper. You KNOW at Virginia Commonwealth he was stumbling into his brown, 3 story 'should-be-condemned' off-campus house (equipped with wood siding and 5 burnout roommates) 2 hours before the first pitch of a Saturday double-header. This guy is no stranger to getting asked to leave John Barleycorn for falling ass backwards into the private party room, reeking like he's been drinking gasoline, asking some rich stockbroker if he can bum a Parliament Light while he ogles the broker's rail-thin girlfriend. Of course, he is also familiar with rolling over in his hotel room in a drunken stooper on a 12 game west coast road trip, and blowing his nose in a shitty, mesh batting practice hat because he is too hungover to gallop to the bathroom for some 5-star, quilted TP. He is also not a stranger to pouring a little Svedka in his Riptide Rush in the bullpen like a freshman coed at a homecoming football game. Some might think "Sean" is an Adonis. Not me, he's a one man party. He wears button down shirts with the top four buttons undone, and dark-washed jeans with vine-like embroidery on the back pockets. You heard it here first. Girls don't really care too much for him because after a few drinks, he starts acting like a frat boy at VCU's flag day parade in mid-July after taking down 12 cans of Natural ICE. Sorry, I got a little carried away with Sean. I feel he deserves it."

For what it's worth, I'm still optimistic for the 139th season of Chicago Cubs baseball. Maybe that's because they haven't even played in a Spring Training game yet, or maybe it's because it's 10:15 AM on a Tuesday and I'm writing blogs for free and desperately need something bigger than my body to consume my free-time. Either way, we got some oldies but goodies (Kerry Wood and Reed Johnson) back for a second go-round with the Northsiders this year and a few free agents (Pena and Garza) who are used to playing in a dome named after an Orange Juice manufacturer and a skipper with horned rimmed specs. It can only go up from here.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man will take the Boilers tonight (+8) in Value City Arena against the #1 team in the land. Personally, I think U of I should have clipped the Buckeyes on Saturday, but it's not always Wine and Swiss in the Big 10, sometimes you have to gnaw on the bread and butter for a while to get your meal. Boiler UP Also, I just recently saw the UCONN/Marquette spread, which is set at MU (-4.5), and nearly caused me to scream an obscenity at my desktop comp. So, if you want to get paid, I advise you to bet on both games. If you want to get greedy, go ahead and parlay the two, I still like your odds.

Pick(s) of the Day: Purdue(+8)@ Ohio State- PURDUE
UCONN (+4.5)@ Marquette- UCONN

Record:(47-34-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Kurt-ain Call

If you didn't catch a glimpse of the Bulls/Bucks game last night on Comcast, you probably won't understand, or be able to fully comprehend the contents of this blog. So, if that's true, you have my permission to ex out the screen and go back to ebaumsworld, or brazzers, or wherever the hell you were before you stumbled upon this website. If you didn't watch though, you surely missed out. If you have been reading this blog long enough, you know that although they hail from Wisco, I sincerely enjoy the Milwaukee Bucks because of their personnel. I've made it clear that CDR has been my boy since his days lookin' off hoes at Memphis, and if Selsun Blue ever needed a campaign spokesperson, they need not look any further than Andrew Bogut. Then again, that dude takes less showers than a roadie for the Queens of the Stone Age, so that might be counterproductive. Anyway, CDR dropped a career-high 30 and Bogut was ripping boards (16 in the first half) like he was working the graveyard shift in the lumberyard. How could these two Bucks possibly be out-staged you may ask? One answer: Kurt Thomas.

I must admit, when Boozer and Noah went down and the Bulls signed "Big Sexy" and started to get him some decent run and even threw him in for the occasional start, I was skeptical. To be honest, I thought he was cut out of the "Todd Collins" mold. In case you are unaware, that's the "how are you still in professional sports after a decade and a half of complete mediocrity?" mold. But, the second oldest player in the league at the ripe ol' age of 38 has impressed me with his performance this season, specifically on the offensive end. KT has been fairly consistent knocking down the 16-20 footer for the Bullies, but what he did to the Bucks last night was downright dirty. Thomas had 8 straight 2nd quarter points on his way to garnering a 22 point, 9 board performance that had Scott Skiles, and the rest of the free world (including the 313) scratching their heads.

You have to give it to Kurtis. Just churning out season after season on 38 year old wheels that act as the only source of stability in carrying a 240 lb. frame with an extraordinarily beefy upper body. And to boot, there is one aspect of Kurt Thomas that goes unnoticed and needs to be mentioned. He has a completely uncanny resemblance to the character of Jerry Johnson from the smash hit, Little Big League (seriously, watch this). He can act, he can defend, and he can stroke like he's Mike Phelps in the lap pool. "Oh, don't do em like dat Big Sexy" -Stacey King

As for Pick of the Day, the Bucks were one more Ersan Ilyasova miracle shot away from a backdoor cover in Chicago, but they failed to deliver. For tomorrow night, there isn't much on the table so the Pulse Man will take a much needed day off and gear up for Wednesday's festivities.

Record:(47-34-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Down and Out

It honestly is too easy to write this. You knew it was coming. You read the millions of facebook statuses, you navigated through the endless hashtags on Twitter calling Cutler a pussy. But why? Was it because we expected our starting quarterback to look interested in the biggest game of his career? Are we mad because we invested more emotion into Sunday's game than Cutler did? Who knows what his injury was, and honestly, who cares? He didn't even look to make an effort to return once he stepped outside the painted lines on the Soldier Field turf Sunday. The absolute least Cutler could have done was give the obligatory limp to the huddle, muster up the courage to take a few snaps, wince in pain, and partake in a completely staged conversation with the athletic trainer demanding that he return to the game. But that's exactly what didn't happen. Aaron Rodgers was taking helmets to the chin, staring down the teeth of the Bears' with a look of defiance, and our chubby quarterback remained stationary on the sideline pondering why he has more than one chin with a smug "What do you think is on UPN Power 50 right now?" look on his face. The only impressive thing Jay did on Sunday was somehow performing live at halftime and showing the raucous Soldier Field crowd his vocal range. Wait, that Lee DeWyze? Who knew? As soon as his phantom "knee injury" (which no one saw, mind you) flared up, Jay strolled to the sidelines, put on his Bears issued trench coat, and talked Caleb Hanie through his progressions on a clipboard that actually had a Chinese takeout menu attached to it instead of Mike Martz's playbook. You can't help but be impressed with Caleb Hanie. He showed some stones and gave the Bears a fighting chance in the final minutes. Then again, he was following Todd Collins, so it really couldn't get much worse unless Crazytown's hit single "Butterfly" was playing in the background of the venue where you were watching the game.

What can you really expect when you have your 3rd string signal caller at the helm in the biggest game of the season? He did all we could ask for and more. All we knew about Caleb Hanie before Sunday was that he had a below average first name and threw a couple good seeds against the Panthers early in the year. Technically, you can say the same thing about Seneca Wallace. Anyway, after reading Rick Reilly's article on ESPN about Cutler last week (I honestly never read Rick Reilly, I think he's a total worm), it occurred to me that maybe Cutler didn't want it. After being saddled with mediocrity as both an amateur (Vandy) and as a professional (Denver and Chicago), perhaps Jay just didn't want the decoration. Maybe he doesn't want to be a "big game quarterback". Maybe he just wants to be a renegade (shot out Uncle Poklop) like Big Ben but not wear the ring like the bathroom rapist does. Even when Collins came in, he looked emotionally invested in the outcome of the game. Granted, he sucks, and he looks like the kind of loser who buys his entire wardrobe at Land's End, but at least he was amp'd up. I mean, Christ, it's the NFC Championship!

When Urlacher stepped up to the mic at his post-game interview and stood behind Cutler (stood behind, get it? hehehe), nobody's opinion changed. He had to do that. If he calls Jay out in front of the national media, the Bears would fold easier than wax paper next year. But could you sense some disappointment? From Urlacher, from Martz, from Lovie, from some random Bear fan named Allan in Wicker Park. Everyone was disappointed. But in the end, maybe we were just disillusioned as to the people we put in positions of power. Gulp, thanks Jay.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man is looking to the NBA as the avenue to achieve his first career betting win as a 23 year old man. For Monday night, the Pulse Man likes the Bucks in Chicago getting 8 points.

Pick of the Day: Bucks(+8) @ Bulls- BUCKS

Record:(47-33-0)

Thanks again to all the people who wrote guest blogs and sent in predictions last week. Congratulations on being a part of the internet. It's a wonderful feeling.

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Round 6

Heres a late entry from the always tardy Lindo. Speaking his heart from the lackluster city of Mundelein, IL.

Let me first make everyone aware that as I am writing this I am feverishly whipping my brow of sweat due to an intense basement Stairmaster workout. With that being said, as Cutler climbs the steps to the astout soldier field, like the rest of Chicago, I’m sure he himself is even wondering which player is going to show up on Sunday. I wasn’t aware that the NFL, warning alliteration ahead, let borderline bedridden bipolar victims play professional football. Lets just say that I know Cutler will take his zaniac before gametime, if not double the dosage. With that being said, I have full confidence that the man who was able to snag Laguna Beach’s forth hottest star will be buckling his helmet come game time. Side note- Does he strike anyone else as a post sex sober?

More important than Cutlers mental state on Sunday and in my opinion the only thing stopping us from booking our flight to Dallas, is the play of the HOGS. The men in the trenches. Yes, the biggest and least athletic men on the field or perhaps in all of sports will decide whether were hitting the bottle in celebration or hitting the drywall in frustration. Shout out to my boy Knucks. All eyes our on the rookie starter J’Marcus Webb and whether he will be able to contain man freak and dark lord worshipper Clay Matthews and keep Jay Cutler upright. As of late, personnal changes have let to better pass protection and run game but if the game comes down to a 2 minute drive needing a late TD, we all might as well tune into the hopefully Tivo-ed and long awaited season 3 premier of Jersey Shore.

I know everyone is sitting, waiting and wishing that LZ’s pride and joy Anthony Castonzo could graduate early and suit up against the Pack but its not plausible. The Bears are stuck with what they have and hopefully the O-Line that has been artfully schooled all year by one of the most respected coached in the league in Mike Tice will show up and not the shitheads that collapsed and gave up a record breaking 11 sacks against the Giants, which was eerily similar to the Jen Shauer BP gas station fiasco. #davemathewsdoesitagain. Stay tuned to this match up of overweight ugly men as it is Lindo’s key to the game. BEARDOWN.

Round 5

Before I let the final previews hit the airwaves for the weekend, I thought I'd give the people exactly what they didn't want--my own opinion, and the opinion of Uncle Poklop. Ironically, our opinions are strikingly similar. "I LIKE THIS GUY" -John Gruden-

First off, we have the opinion of Uncle Poklop, residing in Lake Zurich, IL. (Note: Just to give you an idea who you are dealing with here, I didn't edit this blog at all. I wanted people to see how Uncle Poklop uses captilization, punctuation, spelling and other writing mechanics that you are supposed to have mastered by the 5th grade.

"I have read about half of the things that you people have been saying about this game and I must same I am pretty impressed with your guy’s ability to regurgitate the shit you see on nfl live and jim rome is burning. Yes we all know the turf will be loose (something funny about Garza’s wife) which will make it tough for packer wide outs. and the wind will be blowing (something funny about Garza’s wife) which will make it hard (something funny about Garza) for the packer punter to keep the ball away from hester. All these things will help lead to the bears victory. But come on man!!!!!!!!!!. The packers play in green bay and are use to the shitty weather games and playing on turf much like garza’s wifes (many of whom have played on both). Look at the quarterbacks that have won this year. It’s not the pretty boys (brady, manning, ryan, and hasselbeck, brees) but it’s the renegades (cutler, Roethlisberger, sanchez, and Rodgers) I will take cutler on the renegade scale over Rodgers any day. Rodgers saw this trend happening early and made a late season push to get the status of a renegade by getting in a relationship with wanna be famous but just a espn slut erin Andrews. No one is buying her as a celeb and no one is buying Rodgers. If he really wants to replace favre and go to the super bowl there had better be a sexual harassment charge in there soon or I better see a dick pic on the internet before game time. Otherwise it looks like our droopy eyed, shitty hair cut, butter face cutler will be tip toeing backwards into the super bowl. Anyone who is willing to date Kristin cavallari for longer than the hump and dump clearly deserves this super bowl. He also demands trades and has a “I don’t give a shit” swagger about him that leads to renegade status. This reason and this alone will be why the bears win this game 20 to 17. They will be meeting the biggest renegade of them all Ben Roethlisberger. Lord help us all against him. I’m sure cutler will have something up his sleeve for the weeks leading up to the super bowl to attempt to overtake the legend of renegade himself. For all you twitter fans out there UnclePdog is the guy to follow. Make it happen"


And, my own opinion. I know you guys wanted it.

"After reading everything that was sent in this week, it seems as if NFL Live is running our lives like Big Brother in 1984. I don't know when Mark Schlereth's opinion became the gold standard in today's world, but it is more disappointing than the plot of a Michael Bay movie (Friday the 13th, Bad Boys II, The Island). I mean seriously, how many times did you hear the phrase "What more could you ask for?" uttered throughout the week? It was as if the entire world had that damn Edwin McCain song ('I Could Not Ask For More') come on their Ipod shuffle at the same exact time. Actually, if I'm a Packer fan I could ask for a lot more. Give them Finley, Barnett and Ryan Grant and this game has a bigger spread than an h'orderves table at a bar mitzvah. Come on now. And, the field. Oh, the field. Have you heard about the field? Guess what? Both teams play on that sorry surface. It will balance out on which team it favors. In case you forgot, Cutler's home splits aren't exponentially better than his road splits either. In fact, they're worse. His completion percentage is 7 points lower at Soldier (57 to 64), and he's thrown 6 more picks at home as oppose to on the road (11 to 5). Cutler is less comfortable at home than J-Lo in her critically acclaimed film, "Enough". Just kidding, that movie sucks.

I agree with most of you that the play of the QB's (Rodgers and Cutler) is of the utmost importance in Sunday's game. But do you people really foresee a game in the mid to high twenties? Have you been outside in the past week? It's miserable out there. If you think those conditions are conducive to offensive production, you should check into the mental institution to start chewing gum with Llyod Braun. So, you may be asking yourself now, "what does this a*&hole think is important? Special teams. That is my answer. Think about it, how easy will it to be to position kick away from Devin Hester amidst 15 mph winds? Remember how bad Tim Masthay kicked at Soldier in week 3? It was pathetic. I can see the Bears parlaying this situation into good field position, but Jay "I don't always throw picks, but when I do, I throw them in the Red Zone" Cutler can sometimes stall a drive faster than a 14 year-old behind the wheel of a manual transmission. Now, I think Mason Crosby is a vital weapon for the Packers too. He is incredibly consistent and for the most part, routinely clutch.

Another factor that I think will be imperative to both teams success on Sunday is the play at the tight end position. The screen game/tight end routes in this game will be crucial, and so far this post-season, Greg Olsen has played great. But, at times he has a tendency to look like a bad-blocking flanker who stole Spencer Pratt's beard. If he comes to play Sunday, he can be a big weapon for the Bears.

So, my prediction is that the game will be mildly entertaining, but much less than what the people have wet their appetite for all week. Maybe that's just the pessimist in me, maybe it's the realist. You decide. Packers-13 Bears-9

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man turns 23 today so I decided to give him the day off to focus on his festivities. However, the line in which he decides to go to sleep (inside or outside the bar) is set at 12:41. Let me know if you want in on the action.

Now we're done. Rack us

Frost

Round 4

Here we go again. As we head into Friday and consequently the weekend, the residents of the Land of Lincoln, as well as America's Dairyland have become equally as gitty for Sunday afternoon's festivities. It's been Blue and Orange nation in Chicagoland this week, and I'm sure the reciprocal color scheme has been dancing around the streets of Wisco since the Packers victory last Saturday. Here are the day's postings. Enjoy


Our first piece of insight comes from none other than our everyday betting extraordinaire, "The Pulse Man" hailing from Lake Zurich, IL.

"Pulse Man's Top 5 Player Prop Bets:

1. Bears 1st Half points- OVER 9 1/2
According to Lindo, the Bears score a ton in the first quarter so this should be a lock.

2. Israel Idonije total tackles and assists- OVER 2 1/2
Israel is the only relatively famous person other than Zoo Rich who I am friends with on Facebook. And, I'm pretty sure he asked me to be friends.

3.Jordy Nelson receiving yards- UNDER whatever it is
I started betting against this loser last year when I found out that there was a professional athlete named Jordy. The line on his receiving yards will probably be in the 30's, but after hearing an interview detailing how he artificially inseminates cows in the off-season, I will take the under on those dirty hands.

4. James Jones receiving yards- OVER 42 1/2
Last week, I bet on Jones' over and he impressed me with 75 yards. Also, with Jordy Nelson not getting a catch this week, my prediction is he will cover the spread with ease. I'm guessing 54 yds.

5. James Starks rushing yards- UNDER 52 1/2
If there was a player prop on Kuhn, obviously that would cover the over, but not former Chicago Bull great John Starks (he did play for the Bulls, Google it).

I will be betting on all of these props this weekend, while wearing skin tight Bears sweatpants and an autographed Tom Waddle jersey, so I should have some extra coin in my pocket (Bodog account) come Monday. One last bet to keep your eye on is that the Super Bowl Champ won't be a Wild Card team set at (+110). That should be a lock because it is going to be Bears vs. Steelers.

Just check the Pulse"


Our next response comes from below the Mason-Dixon line and is our first voice from neither Wisconsin or Illinois. Here is the opinion of "Confederate Degenerate" from Tuscaloosa, Alabama. The South has risen again.

"Lets get real people. Jay Cutler has been on a bender reminiscent of Patrick Kane since his days down south at Vandy. He has Grey Goose on ice while sitting in the cold tub. In fact, Cutler puts down the Goose similar to the oldest Caramusa brother, what's his name again? Who cares? The Bears on Sunday will use the "us against the world" mentality that they have channeled so well all season. Brian Urlacher and Lance Briggs should bring the wood, which means Aaron Rodgers should be prepared to have his body imprinted in the awful soldier field turf. The only concern is if Green Bay's hippie linebackers smells an aroma of cannabis in Cutler's hand-warmers, it could make for a long day. The final piece to the puzzle separating the Bears from a dance under the big top in Dallas is this: Can the Bears keep Cutler on his feet long enough to catch a buzz? My vote is we will be hearing Troy Aikman rub one out to Mike Tice all afternoon. I like the Bears 27-23. Throw another 45 on the Rack."

There you have it people. If you want to still get posted, get your previews to me by tomorrow afternoon (chicagosportsnoise@gmail.com). Want it, get it.

Now they're done. Rack em

Frost

Round 3

After the email address Chicagosportsnoise@gmail.com received its first ever message in over 4 months as a functional account, the files have started to roll in steadily. As we pass hump day on the weekday calendar, and the end of the work week nears, I urge you to send your opinion to me as soon as you can if you want it posted before the game. I don't work weekends, let's be real. And we all know how little people accomplish on their desk on a Friday, it's more Pandora than production--I have no doubt. So without further ado, here are some new installments regarding Sunday's showdown.

Our first message comes from "On the Ag" from Milwaukee, Wisconsin via the social netwroking website Twitter.com.
"I just got done watching an episode of MTV's True Life on Jay Cutler: I have more chins than playoff wins"

Next, we have the fresh, free-spirited, college opinion of "Brett n Butter", writing us from Illinois State University in Bloomington-Normal, IL.

"Has there been a more anticipated game in Chicago sports history than the upcoming NFC Championship game between the Bears and the Packers? The game is expeceted to have the 4th highest average ticket price of all time, trailing only the past 3 Super Bowls, in the rivals' first ever playoff matchup since 1941. The Bears enter the game as home underdogs, which comes to no surprise to any NFL observer. The Packers come in as the league's hottest team, thrashing top-seeded Atlanta (pun intended) in the Georgia Dome just a week ago. The Bears caught a big break by getting Seattle last week in which could be best described as a must-win tune up. However, as we view the matchup it may be unwise for Packer fans to start booking their flights to Dallas.

When these teams met in Week 3, Chicago was able to pull out a win thanks to untimely turnovers and penalties by Green Bay. Were the Bears lucky to win that game? Absolutely. The Bears are a much improved team since that game though. Thanks to that game the Bears are hosting this game, and the importance of this cannot be stressed enough. When Week 17 came around, the Bears had nothing to gain or lose. However, they still competed, much to the dismay of soccer mom's who feared some of the Bears' key players would get hurt. Bears fans can only hope Mike Martz was trying to withold the team's best offense that day, because they looked as out of synch as a Poklop-Gaynor karaoke duo.

As we dissect the matchups between the two teams, it is tough to argue that the Bears have an edge on offense or defense. Aaron Rodgers is playing as well as any QB in recent memory and James Starks has added a new element to a formerly one-dimensional offensive attack. While the comparison on defense is much closer, Green Bay boasts the superior defensive backfield that will certainly not make life easy on Jay Cutler as he dodges the consistent blitzes of Dom Capers' 3-4 defense.

So I'm picking the Packers to win this one? As Lee Corso would say, "not so fast my friend!" The Bears are the beneficiary of two of the game's great equalizer. First of all, Devin Hester gives the Bears a field position edge in nearly every game. Whether or not they kick to the future Hall of Famer is irrelevant, it will still result in favorable starting positions for the often inconsistent Bears offense. Not to mention the fact that the Soldier Field playing surface can make those trying to chase down the electrifying return man look they just got victimized by a banana peel in Mario Kart. That brings me to my 2nd equalizer, which is the game being at Soldier Field. Not only will crowd noise be a major factor, but the Bears' familiarity with with the heavily criticized playing surface will certainly play a part in slowing down the explosive Packers offense. Keep in my mind this game will not be played indoors like the last game Green Bay took part in, a game in which they looked unstoppable. The sloppier the game, the more it favors the Bears who will likely rely on forcing turnovers and winning the field position battle in order to stay in the game.

My prediction: the Bears offense plays well enough and the defense will be as opportunistic as they have been all season. The Bears win a classic, 24-23."

Now they're done. Rack em

Frost

Round 2

The gauntlet has been thrown down by the Green Bay faithful, but Chicago has answered. And, although after seeing The Dilemma last night, I am almost embarrassed to call the City of Big Shoulders home, the voice of the city must still ring. What an abomination that film was. You're better off spending $9 on MGMT "Oracular Spectacular" CD and taking enough psychedelic amphetamines to fall asleep comfortably. Anyway, here is today's new installment of opinions from the readers of Chicago Sports Noise.

First off, we have "Dr. Souce" from Lake Zurich, Illinois

"I doubt anyone in Chicago is going to deny that Aaron Rodgers is a top-notch quarterback. He has got the skills to avoid the rush, hit receivers downfield, all at the same time possessing the ability to grow one of the finest rapist mustaches in the Midwest. Chris Hanson can vouch for that.

The Bears definitely have a great opportunity to pull off the upset this weekend. The obvious key is to keep the Packers high-octane offense off the field. In our previous two contests this year, we have held them to 6-21 on 3rd down conversions. I’ll take that any day. Our defense has to come and play, no doubt about that. We know their offense, we know their tendencies. Just don’t let Greg Jennings get past you.

Primary concern is going to fall on the Cutler-Martz combination. Martz will be opening up the playbook more after having a very basic approach in week 17. It’s going to be up to Jay Cutler, to get the ball in the receivers hands, and key where Woodson is lining up. Damnit Jay, do not turn the ball over you dick! With the Packers depleted LB corps, I expect Olsen to have a good day again.

I’m cautiously optimistic when making my prediction. But I say the Bears take this win 24-17."


Next, we have a "Treat from Meat" hailing, once again, from Lake Zurich, Illinois

"Bears/Packers for the NFC title. What more could any of us ask for? For that matter, what more could the NFL ask for? Two storied franchises with big named quarterbacks, linebackers and coordinators; even the punters and kickers are highly touted.

I'll start with the Packers. Before the season started, a lot of people had them in the Super Bowl. But after countless key injuries, their stock fell, yet they still found a way to make it to the playoffs and now they're playing for a trip to Dallas. The Packers have the hottest QB in the NFL and a defensive coordinator who knows how to utilize his freakishly athletic LB, Clay Mathews.

As for the Bears, before the season started one would be hard-pressed to find anyone who picked them to finish over .500, let alone making it to the NFC title game at HOME! The 2010 Bears are one of the biggest overachievers since the Cardinals in '08. The recipe of great Defense and superb Special Teams have taken them this far with the help of the second hottest QB in the NFL, Jay Cutler (Yea, I said it). Although, if the Bears are to win this game it's going to come down to the Bears D coming up with big stops versus Rodgers.

As much as I'd like to pick the Packers, as a Bears fan I cannot. I'm going with the Bears over the Packers 24-21, with the game ending on a 4th down slip by a Packers receiver on the notorious Soldier Field grass. It's called home field advantage for a reason. Also, the fact that the Packers barely beat the Bears the last game of the season at home fighting for the final playoff spot in the NFC only helps my pick. I just don't see the Bears luck running out, this week at least. The "Hay Bowl" should be fun to watch. Bear the eff down"


To break up the point of view, here is the opinion of "Baby got Bach" from Milwaukee, WI

"You couldn't ask for a better NFC playoff matchup. WHY NOT?!? Bears and Packers, Super Bowl on the line. No two teams in NFL history have shared as much history as these foes. It doesn't matter what happened in the regular season, throw away what Green Bay has done the last two weeks in Philly and Atlanta, or what Chicago did against Seattle. It simply doesn't matter in this one.

I am not a fan of the Bears by any means, but it is hard not to respect what they have done this year. Nobody gave them a chance since day 1 and once again, they are home underdogs in the NFC Championship game. I think a lot depends on the weather. The Packers are a more talented team, but the weather can neutralize everything. The Bears, on the other hand, have a much more polished running game and their defense gives up close to nothing on the ground. But, it is going to come down to the offensive lines. If the Packers can consistently get to Cutler and disrupt his rhythm, they will win, and the same goes for the Bears' pressure up front against Aaron Rodgers. If Rodgers is able to sit in the pocket or buy time with his crafty wheels and hit members of his talented receiving core down the field, it's going to be a long day for the Bears D.

Bottom line, Cutler can flat out sling the rock, and if he can manage his team efficiently from start to finish and throw the ball accurately, it could be a long afternoon for me in Wisconsin in which I polish off 44 cocktail meatballs and take enough tums to kill a small farm animal. Like Favre always presented, Cutler will bless the opposition with a few opportunities to snag interceptions, and the Pack must take advantage of those (unlike the great ball Cutler threw against Seattle to the corner of the endzone). Like any football game, turnovers and penalties are going to be crucial. And, I hate to break it to you Bear fans, but we're not going to give you the gift of committing 19 penalties again like we did week 3 in Chi-town, unless Bulaga goes out on Saturday night, in that case, I'll kill him myself.

I do like the fact that the Packers have already gone into two hostile environments and picked up wins on the road in the first 2 rounds. Say what you want about the dome atmosphere in Atlanta, but they went out and got it done in Philly as well, which was on a windy and cold day in Pennsylvania. But again, none of this matters, these teams know each other so well. I'm getting chills thinking that the winner of this game gets a shot at the Lombardi trophy and is entitled to an entire year of "ish" talking to your Chicago/Milwaukee friends (if you even stay friends after this one).


Next, we have the familiar voice of "The Body" coming straight out of his parents' basement in Lake Zurich, IL

"Sunday's game will mark the second time that two of the most storied franchises in the NFL meet in the playoffs. The Bears won the first match up a week after Pearl Harbor, a game that apparently didn't live in infamy because I have never heard it referenced in my life before the Bears win last week. Regardless, fans and media have hyped this game to be the most important game in Packers/Bears history. The winner moves on to face the AFC Champ (Big Ben's Bathroom Rapists or Toe Sex Rex) in the first Super Bowl in Dallas' beautiful new stadium (yes, I used the word beautiful, and I saw Country Strong with a guy last week). The loser will not only be eliminated from the playoffs, but will have to bow to the other team and honor their new reign as King of the NFC North.

After the Packers dismantling of Matty Ice and the Falcons in Atlanta, it is hard to imagine that any team could slow down their explosive offense. Good for the Bears, the infamous turf at Soldier Field should be able to do that for us. It will be much harder for the uber talented Aaron Rodgers to complete his timing routes and back-shoulder passes to his plethora of receivers when they are out there slipping like my Derece Bannick in Cool Runnings the first time they step on the ice. Shouldn't this negatively effect the Bears as well you might ask? Well, due to our offensive line's new found ability to block (thanks to Mike Tice), the Bears should be able to shove a consistent dose of Forte and Taylor down the Packers' throat. I'm not saying we are going to run all over the Pack, who boast an extremely stout defensive unit, but our dedication to the run should open up play-action passes to our tight ends and also open up the field for our midget men (Hester and Knox),who both have arguably the best speed in the NFL. Speed kills, literally, I've done it.

I have not seen the weather forecast yet for this highly anticipated game, but the meteorologist in me is predicting it to be cold (20's or below), windy, with a good chance of snow lake effect snow trickling down throughout the game. These conditions, plus the aforementioned turf, will hopefully slow down Aaron Rodgers and give the Bears a realistic chance of winning the NFC Championship. This is hard to imagine because not a single Bear fan (including myself) expected the Monsters of the Midway to be over .500 this season. Sometimes, the best presents are the ones you don't expect. Hopefully, Cutler can keep his blood sugar up and the Bears can deliver at least one more unexpected present."


Also chiming in, we have the "Speakin' Deacon", also from Lake Zurich, IL

"It's going to be a good ole fashioned air attack this weekend between the Bears and the Packers, a battle of the gunslingers, Cutler vs. Rodgers. It couldn't be written any better. This game is going to be won on which defense can force the most mistakes out of the opposing QB. The Bears D has been playing rock solid, a few hiccups throughout the season, but I feel they have all the kinks worked out, it's playoff football folks. They showed their skills against the Seahawks last week with 3 quarters of shutout football. Cutler has been looking stellar and if he can continue his precision under pressure, he will pick the Pack apart like a surgeon, even though they have the second best D in the league. The key to the Bears' air attack will rest on the shoulders of Forte, who is responsible for pounding the rock to keep the Packers guessing whether it will be a pass or run on each play. Each team won on their home turf and split the season series. The Bears had a lock on a playoff spot, but still chose to play all of their starters in week 17, giving them a great feel for what they will be going against on Sunday. I see a real barn-burner in the future for this game, with each quarterback racking up good numbers, but not a scoreboard explosion. Prediction: Bears-27 Packers-23."


Lastly, we have the "Wizard of Wheaton" who chimed in her two cents with this SMS message:

"According to People Magazine, Kristin Cavallari is in love, why wouldn't you be afraid of Cutler now?"

There you have it. The tribe has spoken yet again...

Now they're done. Rack em

Frost

First Round

Whether your intro song is "Start Me Up" (Rolling Stones), "Let's Get It Started" (Black Eyed Peas) or "Milkshake" (Kelis), you better get it into gear. Let the good blogs roll. The first few responses to Packers/Bears III have been coming in and they are posted below. Just to save everyone from being terminated from their jobs for being published on such a low-functioning website, I have cleverly disguised your real names with impressively lame phrases. Trust me, you'll know who you are...


Our first response, from "Dat Puffey and the Family" from Wauwatosa, WI

What Constitutes an Elite Quarterback?

Since becoming the starting quarterback of the Packers in 2008, one of the biggest criticisms of Aaron Rodgers is his lack of a marquee playoff win. This is a theme that ESPN has beaten into the ground, and has been regurgitated by columnists nationwide including John Czarnecki of Fox Sports and Patrick Clarke of the Bleacher Report. Everybody’s second favorite ESPN NFL Draft analyst, Mel Kiper Jr., went on “The Sports Reporters” a couple weeks ago and reiterated that point, stating that Rodgers needs a playoff win to validate himself as a great quarterback in the NFL.

Terence Moore of Fanhouse took it a step further, making the argument that Rodgers needs a Super Bowl win to be considered elite. In the same column, Moore went on to say that Dan Marino was just a “pretty” quarterback because of his lack of a Championship, so you can interpret that however you’d like.

That being said, I still feel obligated to defend Rodgers against these arguments, as a closer look at his playoff resume will show that he is already well on his way to being an elite quarterback in the NFL, if he isn’t there already.

As I said earlier, prior to these playoffs Rodgers had not won a playoff game as a starting quarterback in the NFL. The ESPN research team really did their homework in digging up this statistic for their audience, combing extensively through his resume of one playoff game, and consequently using this as a promo tool throughout the week for the wild card game against the Eagles. “It’s the Rehabilitated Dog-Fighter vs. Brett Favre’s successor who has never won in the playoffs!!!” (Ok, I made that tagline up, but it’s not a far cry from what we were beaten over the head with all week leading up to that game.)

You read that correctly, one playoff game.

On top of that, the one playoff game that the entire premise was based off of was a 45-51 loss to the Cardinals in 2009, in which he went 28/42, 422 yards, 4 touchdowns, and 1 interception. It seems idiotic to put that loss on his shoulders – despite his overtime fumble leading to Arizona’s game winning field goal – as 45 points should be enough for a win under almost any circumstances. That loss was on the defense.

In these playoffs, he opened with an 18/27, 180 yards, and 3 touchdown performance in hostile Philadelphia. Not a jaw-dropping stat line by any means, but it was enough to get the win, and for some critics, it was enough to get the monkey off his back. He followed that up with an epic 31/36, 366 yards, and 4 total touchdowns performance against the Falcons on Saturday night.

Based on these three games, his average career stat line as an NFL starting quarterback in the playoffs is a 73% completion percentage, 323 yards, 3.67 total touchdowns, and .33 interceptions. On a larger scope, let’s see how this compares to the first three playoff games as a starter (per game averages) for some of the other “elite” quarterbacks in the league.

Name/Completion Pct./Passing Yards/TD’s (passing and running)/Interceptions
Rodgers- 73/323/3.67/.33
Brady*- 57/219/1/.33
Manning- 48/186/.67/.67
Brees- 64/305/1.67/.67
Favre- 60/266/1.67/1

*Due to injury in his 2nd playoff game, I used his 1st, 3rd, and 4th playoff games for these averages.

It would be interesting to see how the media would be treating Rodgers if he hadn’t been the successor to Brett Favre in Green Bay. If he had taken over for Bledsoe, Harbaugh, Flutie or Majkowski would columnists like Moore still be making the claim that he needs to win a Super Bowl to be considered “elite”? (He wrote that column after the Atlanta game)

All told, it seems easy for the national media to make opinion based arguments like these in their critique of Rodgers, because a more thorough analysis of his statistics make his playoff resume very difficult to criticize. Until they come to this realization, I suppose we will have to continue to listen to the debate as to whether or not he is “elite” continue.

If he does go on to win the Super Bowl this season, I am curious to see the direction that the criticism against him will go. We’ve been given a sampling of that this week with life-long Vikings fan, and ProFootballTalk.com’s main contributor Mike Florio’s article in which he attacked Rodgers for failing to give an autograph to a fan that had cancer in the airport after the Atlanta game. Florio clearly did a minimal amount of homework on this story prior to publishing it, and followed it up by defending his initial stance, even after more information emerged on the incident that changed many people’s perspective on the incident.

I am not going to get into the details of the cancer patient snub discussion, as I feel it is overblown (although in retrospect, he probably should have just signed the autograph – though he did sign one for her last week as well and she supposedly goes to the airport after just about every road game), but the point remains. To question whether or not Rodgers is “elite” is turning into an irrelevant discussion.

His numbers speak for themselves, and I have a feeling that ten years from now if he continues to play to his abilities, the “is he an elite quarterback in the NFL?” discussion will turn into “is he one of the all time great quarterbacks in the NFL.”

Go Pack Go


Our second response comes from "DVR" (Dad Van Roy, not to be confused with the TV recording device) from De Pere, WI

"If the weather is clear, we have nothing to fear, Pack by 10"


They're done. Rack 'em both.

Frost

Cleveland Rocks

Anybody who has seen a single episode of the Drew Carey Show has unfortunately heard the worst intro song in the history of sitcom television, and thus sat through at least a couple minutes of one of the worst TV shows created since M*A*S*H, or at least since SKIN made its debut last night on MTV. "Cleveland Rocks" is a complete lie. That's why the Browns moved to Baltimore, LeBron moved to Miami and everyone with a job moved out of Ohio, or at the very least, out of Cuyahoga County, even the Bone Thugs. But, there is often times a silver lining to the word Cleveland when added into someone's name. For example, Grover Cleveland is the only American President ever to serve two terms (22nd and 24th president), and still managed to accomplish absolutely nothing while in office. Kudos to you, Grover. Also, that spinoff, lisp-ridden foil character from Family Guy got his own show, which garnered worse ratings than The Nanny, and eventually collapsed before it ever really started. In the case of DePaul basketball, there is another young, promising Cleveland making waves in the Big East, and his name is Cleveland Melvin. However, much like the aforementioned people and places, DePaul basketball sucks.

It's safe to say that Oliver Purnell's plan at DePaul hasn't exactly "took off" in Rosemont, which is strikingly ironic considering how close the multi-purpose venue is to the O'Hare airport. In fact, the only time I have heard the word "Demon" mentioned recently came when a good friend of mine, whom we will call El Don, referred to his cabin mates on a Wisconsin ski trip as "sexy, little demons". But that is neither here nor there. The fact of the matter is that DePaul, although utterly atrocious and currently winless in the Big East, may still boast the Freshman of the Year in Baltimore native, Cleveland Melvin. "My favorite Melvin" is currently averaging 14.2 PPG on the year as a whole and has even managed to get even more buckets during DePaul's games in the best collegiate basketball conference in America (22.8 PPG in conference play). Melvin is also managing to pull down nearly 5 boards per game from the forward position and is somehow averaging below 1 helper per game (0.6 APG, 11 total on the season). Now that's DePaul basketball, low and behold.

Still, Cleveland's immense potential as a Freshman in the Big East can't go without being noticed. He's already dropped 29 on JT-triple sticks' G-town Hoyas and had his best game of the year (25 and 12) against Kemba Walker's UCONN Huskies. With DePaul going into the Bradley Center to face Marquette tonight, Melvin has a chance to make a Hamilton Porter-type splash in the Big East by knocking off an overachieving MU squad, ceremoniously kicking off this Chicago vs. Wisconsin week on the right foot. Remember, DePaul broke its "running the table in reverse" streak in the Big East against Marquette last year, thoroughly embarrassing the Golden Eagles. Will any of you watch this game? Eh, probably not. Hell, I'm not going to waste a perfectly good Tuesday night watching DePaul basketball. But, check the box score tomorrow and it might smell like Cleveland in the air, or maybe that's just the smell of unemployment.

As for Pick of the Day, in one of the most entertaining and spurt-heavy games I have ever witnessed, Pitt knocked off Syracuse at home by 8 (2 more than the spread), and gave the Orange, and the Pulse Man their 1st and 33rd losses of the season respectively. For tonight, the Pulse Man likes Illinois on the moneyline (-180) at home and coming off consecutive losses against Draymond "Trimspa" Green and Sparty. I-L-L.

Pick of the Day: Illinois (moneyline) vs. Michigan St.- ILLINOIS

Record:(46-33-0)

Don't forget to email your thoughts, opinions, predictions or lashings for this weekend's Packer/Bear game to chicagosportsnoise@gmail.com.

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Bear Necessitites

Be careful what you wish for. The Pulse Man put the his nickels and dimes on Aaron Rodgers Saturday night and right on queue, the Packers QB ended up "airin" it out (no pun intended) on the Dirty Birds and dropped a 48 on the Georgia Dome scoreboard. Now, what has transpired in the NFC Championship is a game of epic proportions. Not even the gum-flapping, unceremonious squad of Jets in NYC can upstage what's goin' down in Chi-town next Sunday afternoon (In honor of MLK day, I'm randomly peppering this blog with Ebonics). The Bears and the Packers, January, bright lights, Troy Aikman announcing while comparing every minuscule game detail to his own career that ended a decade ago. Is this heaven? No, it's the NFC.

Truth be told, everyone and their brother penciled the Packers in as the NFC representative in Dallas next month, but the only people in Vegas that bet on the Bears to make it to February were a couple of lushes from Lombard who had money to blow after winning a few lucky spins of Roulette. In all fairness to the Pack, they bounced back from losing their starting running back, their freak tight end, a core linebacker and countless others, so there stock dropped lower than Liz Claiborne Inc. at certain spots this year. In fact, Green Bay's training room at the halfway point of the season looked like a scene for Kate Beckinsale's character (Nurse Evelyn Johnson) in Pearl Harbor. In the Bears' case, nobody trusted Cutler to will his team to the NFC title game, even with the cakewalk Seahawks at home in January. At the start of the season, nobody even trusted Cutler to throw a vortex, and now he's the captain of this crew's stunning rise to power this season. Don't uproot the tree before you taste the fruit, amirite?

With all these heartwarming story lines in play this weekend, we must be reminded of certain key points. For instance, either the Packers are going to make the Super Bowl with the Brandon Jackson/James "Don't call me John" Starts platoon in their backfield, or the Bears are going to strut into Dallas Stadium with Hester and Knox as their starting wideouts. Whichever the case, it will undoubtedly be the worst backfield/receiving core in the history of the sport. I'm just glad those geezers from the Visa commercial will be in attendance.

As the bad blood between Bear and Packer fans spreads from Burbank up to Baraboo, west to Lacrosse and down through Lake Villa, I am leaving Chicago Sports Noise as an open forum for people to voice their own opinions throughout the week. You have a prediction? Lay it on me. You have insight into how you think the game is going to play out? Share the word. If you just want to make fun of Wisconsin people for having Madison as their state's mecca, by all means, use this blog as your avenue. To have something posted, just email chicagosportsnoise@gmail.com (this account has never received a non-span email, so needless to say I'm excited), or tweet @frostyaustin (definitely the option most in touch with 2011). And lastly, let us try to keep the vulgarity at a minimum. I mean, come on, it's MLK day.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man likes the 'Cuse getting 6 at Pitt. Granted, Jamie Dixon's hair defies the laws of modern physics, but Syracuse is making a push at that numba one spot!

Pick of the Day: Syracuse (+6) @ Pitt- SYRACUSE

Record:(46-32-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Heat Check

For the first time in the young year of 2011, Chicago becomes 'witness' to the Holy Triumvirate. No, the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit aren't making a guest appearance at Holy Name Cathedral on Saturday. Instead, LeBron, Wade and that 6'10'' left-handed extra-terrestrial roll into Chi-town still yielding the 2nd best record (30-11) in the Eastern Conference (behind Boston 29-9) despite losing two straight to the Clippers and the Nuggets. I repeat, losing to the Clippers and the Nuggets--a perpetual third-tier Western Conference bottomfeeder and a team plagued by more possible trade implications than the ever-strenuous relations between Cuba and United States. Sure, Lebron's ankle/hamstring/ego injury has sidelined him in both of these woeful losses, but this game is still one of the most anticipated regular season contests for the Bulls so far in this season's first half. Perhaps LeBron was trying to prove a point in his absence over the last week, revealing that the Heat are merely lukewarm (no pun intended) without the presence of the most explosive athlete in professional sports. Or, perhaps he's just a yellow belly (it's a tragedy nobody used this term after 1950) who can't grind through an injury for his team. By no means am I a "LeBron hater" and I promise you that I have never uttered the phrase "LeLoser", but I'll still take the latter in this case.

But this game has deeper value for the Bulls than simply one-upping LBJ as an artificial ego boost. It is a chance for the Bulls to show that they can beat both teams that they trail in the conference standings at the United Center. Last week, the Bulls proved they could outlast the Celtics behind a jubilant United Center crowd poised for a promotional Big Mac. On Saturday, they will once again have to rise to the occasion against the most top-heavy team in the history of the NBA (...and that officially marks the first time I've ever used the phrase 'top-heavy' negatively in my entire life, what a shame).

But as Derrick Rose's legend grows with each astonishing fast-break embarrassment of an opposing defender, the Bulls inch closer to becoming a legitimate contender for the Eastern Conference crown. Outside of the City of the Alamo in which the Spurs simply don't lose, and Gregg Popovich never changes facial expressions, the Bulls and Celtics are tied for the 2nd best home record in the NBA at 17-3. But, as well as they've played at home, the Bulls have lost to the Nets, Bobcats and Sixers on the road. If you didn't know any better, you would think that I was rehashing the road results of the miserable Cavaliers, who incredulously failed to score 60 points against the Lakers earlier this week. If the Bulls put one in the W column on Saturday night, even if LeBron is absent from class, it would be a statement win to the rest of the Eastern Conference. Almost a sort of "Bright Lights" (I truly am sorry for this link) welcoming to the spotlight for the new-look Bulls. Just remember the lyrics Rob Thomas so beautifully echoed through the speakers of your parents' Camry in 2004, "If the bright lights don't recede you, just turn yourself around and come on home", we know you can always win there.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man finds himself in the midst of a 2-bet plunge for the first time in 2011. In order to find a way out of his losing streak, he has put his faith in Aaron Rodgers and the Packers to dethrone the #1 seed in the NFC, or at least cover the 2.5 point spread. Often times, when everyone thinks something is going to happen, it never does (Seahawks surprising Saints last week). But in this case, I think Aaron Rodgers is going to have his "Yes, I have a mustache. Yes, I'm sleeping with Erin Andrews. And Yes, I'm the best damn quarterback in the NFC!" type of game. I don't like the Packers, but he's hard not to like. Go ahead Aaron, show Atlanta the effing belt! Packers/Bears NFC Championship would be incredible. Undoubtedly the stuff that ruins friendships. Da da da, duh da da da....GO PACK GO.

Pick of the Day: Packers (+2.5) @ Falcons- PACKERS

Record:(45-32-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Battle Wound

Talor Battle has been the best kept secret in the Big-10 for nearly 4 years now. He is one of the most dangerous guards in the conference, but is locked in the basketball jail of Happy Valley, PA. Battle's talent disguised in the face of Nittany Lion basketball is like if you were to keep the Dr. Dre 2001 CD inside the Chingy Jackpot album jacket, it's simply a travesty on all accounts. Not that Illinois didn't know about Battle or wasn't prepared for him, but Talor lit up the #16 Illini for 27 in a 57-55 victory last night in Pennsylvania. Initially, you immediately thought, "how did U of I just lose to Penn St., they haven't been good since...ever." Yeah, you're right. But don't write off Talor Battle as arguably the most complete player in the Big 10. Last year, Battle was the only player in D1 college basketball to lead his team in scoring (18.8), rebounding (5.4), assists (4.1) and steals (1.1). How come you haven't heard of him? Essentially, it's the same reason why nobody had heard about The Wonders from That Thing You Do! before Mr. White (Tom Hanks) stepped in and gave Guy Patterson those shades--they are in Pennsylvania! It takes at least a calendar year for anything popular in PA to make its way to Big-10 country. Yet, there's a Big 10 school in Pennsylvania. I try to forget.

Still, whether it be to play Talor Battle or fight the Battle of Big Horn, U of I needs to start showing up on the road. All 4 of their losses have now come outside of Assembly Hall. They lost to Texas in New York, got overran by Mizzou at a neutral site in St. Louie, embarrassingly got dropped by UIC at the UC (you see? get it? nevermind) and then lost last night to Penn St. in the Bryce Jordan Center. Illinois has been tremendous at home, beating good teams (Wisconsin, Northwestern?, UNC) rather handily and looking like a sharp, well-executing, top-10 team in the process. But on the road, the story is much more slanted, and needs to be ironed out immediately if Illinois is going to compete for a Big 10 title like their preseason hopes entailed.

For me, road games are much like 22 year old sleepovers at a friends/acquaintances house. Crazy I still do it, I know. First, find your niche (offense). How good of friends are you with the apartment/house owner? Can you finagle your way into an empty bed? Test the waters a little. If you can't make headway in a hostile environment with a lot of guests (tough Big-10 arenas- Breslin, Kohl, Mackey, etc.), then find a spot on the carpet and get a few pillows (offensive boards, second chance points). Just make sure you come prepared and have something you can rely on (defense/ample space on the ground) so you don't end up sleeping on the kitchen hardwood and are shelved for the next week with a bruised hip. At this point, there is no way anyone is still following this analogy, so I'll let it die. Still, it is imperative for Illinois to 'get comfortable' on the road if they're going to be successful in the thick of the Big-10 season. Otherwise, it could be a miserable morning.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man got "Jimmer'd" last night as the BYU boy-band megastar dropped 47 on the Runnin' Utes and obliterated the 12 point spread in the process. For tonight, the Pulse Man likes the Hawks giving 4 to the Raptors in Canada. After watching Toronto twice this season, I have yet to figure out how they have beaten anyone.

Pick of the Day: Hawks (-4) @ Toronto- HAWKS

Record:(45-31-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost

Don't Sleep on Seattle

Being a 10+ point favorite in the NFL playoffs is like wearing an Aeropostale screen-printed graphic tee in mixed company, you just never want to be that guy, or in this case, that team. The Saints found this out the hard way and find themselves watching the rest of the playoffs on plasma screens all across the Big Easy. I mean, last Saturday was literally an apocalyptic performance by the Seahawks. Bearing an offense that sputtered to a 7-9 finish in the regular season, the Seahawks rode the "locker room material" 10-point spread and used it to their advantage in a game against the defending Super Bowl Champions. Were you surprised that Marshawn Lynch turned into Walter Payton for a few hours Saturday? How about Matt Hassellbeck finally getting recognized as a winning playoff QB rather than just The View's Elizabeth Hasselbeck's brother-in-law? Everyone knew that the Seahawks could make a competitive game out of it as long as the contest was held at Qwest Field, yet the oddsmakers still wrote off Seattle as 10-point dogs and watched it blow up in the collective face of the New Orleans.

The good news about Sunday is that the Bears get the Seahawks in Chicago this week, far away from the rain-soaked turf of the Pacific Northwest. And, although the Seahawks ousted the Bears in week 6, I would much rather see Pete Carroll's bunch try and defeat the Bears on the cow pasture that is often times referred to as Soldier Field. But, as is always the case, with good news comes some bad, or at least weary news about Sunday's divisional round game this weekend. Once again, the Seahawks come into the game as 10-point takers. Did they not earn any recognition from Vegas after dropping 41 on the NFC South's beloved Saints? Apparently not. Like I said, 10-point underdogs are as dangerous as an abundance of Mexican food before a 3 hour a movie. This is not something you mess around with.

Although the Bears have looked strong coming down the stretch to finish their regular season, the Seahawks have won back-to-back must-win's to keep their 2010-2011 season alive. Granted, they didn't exactly look like world-beaters against the Rams in week 17, but they did look as possessed as Shelley Duvall in The Shining against the Saints. The last positive for the Bears is the Seahawks haven't had a regular starting quarterback with a visible hairline in nearly two decades (Dilfer, Kitna, Hasselbeck), so we have that going for us, which is nice.

As for Pick of the Day, the Pulse Man reached the 45 win plateau last week and is inching closer to betting transcendence with each and every pick. For tonight, the Pulse Man likes Utah covering the 12 points they are getting at home from BYU in the annual Mountain West Mormon battle in Salt Lake City.

Pick of the Day: BYU @ Utah (+12)- UTAH

Record:(45-30-0)

Now I'm done. Rack me

Frost