Balk This Way

Down the left field line at Clark and Addison is where an eclectic collection of questionable souls, otherwise known as the Cubs pitchers congregate. Whether they have their mouths so full of Skoal Citrus that they cannot speak, or they are talking about Bob Howry's lycanthropology (the study of werewolves as humanity in a cultural context)degree from McNeese State University, they are truly a dubious group. This post addresses what you might find in these certain players ipods, disc-men or in Tom Gorzelanny's case,his Zune 30 gig Digital Media Player.

Tom Gorzelanny - Isn't really in the bullpen consistently but definitely deserves to be.When he isn't swinging through the Wendy's drive through to grab a #6 (w/ no tomato and a side of ranch), or perusing the local GameStop for the latest shoot-em-up game for his X-Box 360, Tom Gorezelanny can be seen cruising in his Honda Pilot to the likes of Nickelback. Usually Gorezelanny is too preoccupied frantically flipping through a Shenmue players guide or watching the timer on the microwave wind down for his Totino pizza rolls to even notice Nickelback sucks. It seems like just yesterday Chicago native Tom's mom brought him to his first concert- The Smashing Pumpkins at All-State Arena, then the Rosemont Horizon. But since then, his musical affinity has hardly grown by leaps and bounds- with bands like Buckcherry and Daughtry boasting multiples titles in his trendy IKEA CD storage unit. It seems as though Gorzelanny's favorite bands are on par with his pitching: forgettable and ultimately below average.

Ryan Dempster - This zany wildman's musical taste is eclectic, exactly what you'd predict. Dempster has been known to compile some liberal playlists during his luau-type roofdeck parties (equipped with freshly, wood-stained privacy fence), as he keeps the margaritas flowing faster than Rusted Root's singer could say "Send me on my way." Much to the chagrin of his Hispanic teammates and players like Jeff Baker who are always trying to get some shut-eye (and dream they are different ballplayers), folky jam bands like John Butler Trio, G Love, and Virginia Coalition can be heard emanating from his iPod headphones on team flights. And being the proud canuck that he is, The Tragically Hip and Crash Test Dummies tunes have also made themselves comfortable on Dempster's Top 25 Most Played iTunes Smart playlist.Yet another case of a Cubs pitcher's musical taste paralleling his pitching performance. Dempster is about as sporadic as it gets, in both categories.

Carlos Marmol -"Los Fabulosos Cadillacs." Watch the video and there will be no need for an explanation.

Bob Howry - Listening to anything out of Bob Howry's music collection will likely make you want to throw yourself in front of a fast-moving Ford Bronco. When Bob Howry isn't ripping phone books in half or dead-lifting refrigerators at Sears for fun, he is usually busy disappointing the Cubbie faithful by throwing 94 MPH fast balls down the middle every time to the NL's premiere hitters. However, when he isn't doing any of those things, he is listening to music that most likely sounds like live recordings of exorcisms. While Howry beats his chest to thrash metal bands like Pantera and Slayer, Samardzija is finishing his take-out lunch Panera meal and listening to John Mayer. Before games, Howry most likely has bench coach Alan Trammel club him over the head repeatedly with a Cubs Louisville Slugger souvenir baseball bat while he rocks out the latest death metal. To finish off this pre-game ritual, Howry probably slams a Monster energy drink, screams his ABC's, and has Soto peg him in the sternum with mid 80's snap throw- all to get 'warmed up.'

As for pick of the day, I'm struggling to survive like sanity in the mind of Mel GIbson. I'm sitting at (1-3-0) and am desperate for a winner. Today,I'll take dice-K and the BoSox on the moneyline over the A's and Ben Sheets at (+106). The Red Sox have been struggling lately but hopefully tonight they can right the ship out west. However, this game will undoubtedly last until 1 AM so I won't be awake when the result comes in, hopefully I can suck it up and manage to not wet the bed.

Daily Pick: Red Sox @ A's, REDSOX moneyline (+106)
Record: (1-3-0)